28 November 2018

#WIPWednesday

Grace.

I am giving myself the gift of grace this week.

I started to feel dispirited for not only failing to write every day the past few weeks, but for not even writing a single day – a single word – this week. I hadn't even opened the program since last #WIPWednesday until it was time to take the screenshot for this morning’s post.

I started to feel guilty about that. I started to feel like a failure – like I'd never see this through.

But, I stopped myself. I offered myself grace.

It has been a difficult couple of weeks over here. This past week even more so than the last.

Out of respect of my loved one’s privacy, I am not going to elaborate (even though I could easily write a few solid essays out of my related experiences).

Suffice it to say that my stress level was off the charts and the sleep deprivation was legit.

I went into what I call my “all business” mode. A coping mechanism I only recently recognized for what it is: emotional avoidance.

Though it is not the healthiest way of dealing with stress – and “all business” did not translate into getting any writing done – it did allow me to be there 100% for my loved one and still host Thanksgiving and even get our Christmas tree up on Sunday; all while having the kids home for Thanksgiving break plus an extra day when a blizzard cancelled school on Monday.

Giving myself grace allowed me to be content with how much I did accomplish in spite of everything. Because, believe me, there were days that simply managing the bare necessities was all I could muster.

And, I may not have written a word, but I did do a few writerly things.

I kept up with my social media goal to keep an active presence with a minimum of one post a day, even though I am behind on scheduling.

I made a few small updates to my blog.

I reorganized my query spreadsheet.

As I mentioned a couple weeks ago, one site had shown interest in syndicating my latest piece; Love What Matters accepted it and ran the feature on Friday.

After receiving a silent rejection for the other syndication query, this week I submitted it to a couple more sites, including one I've not yet worked with.

And I am here today, writing this #WIPWednesday post instead of just throwing up my hands.

21 November 2018

#WIPWednesday

Life has been happening hard over here this week.

I didn't write much, but I did write. The novel's word count is now 15,312.

I did not write any new essays. I did not send any new queries. I did not receive any new rejections.

I don't have much to say this week, but I am still here!

14 November 2018

#WIPWednesday

Welp. I was rolling in self-doubt this week.

Rolling. In. It.

I didn't keep track, but if I had, I'd be ashamed to admit how many hours I wasted just staring at that blinking cursor.

One of the reasons I was so excited about writing this novel was that I had never read, heard, or seen another utopian world like the one I dreamt up. I honestly thought I had a completely unique idea.

I should have known better.

In my researching, I came across a book written over 40 years ago. A book I had never heard of when my utopia took shape in my mind. I, of course, went to the library to check it out. My local library did not have the book; so, I requested it be sent from another library. It came. I read it.

A fascinating read, but one that sent me into a tailspin.

Even though the overall story is quite different than the one I am trying to write, there are several similarities. A few details nearly identical.

It was crushing. Absolutely crushing. Confusing. Conflicting. Do I change these details now? Are there other stories out there just as similar to the one I thought was entirely my own unique creation? Is there any point in trying to write my story anymore?

On top of that, I received the silent rejection of no reply during the stated time-frame from yet another publisher for my children's book manuscript.

Then, the essay I had submitted for publication a couple weeks ago was rejected. When I sent that off, I felt confident about it being a good fit for their audience. Getting another rejection was deflating.

I was disheartened. Disenchanted.

To be honest, I still am, a bit. But I am resolved not to give up.

I decided to keep writing my story, as I envisioned it. If need be, those details can be changed in the edits. But even keeping to my original vision has been a struggle. I am second-guessing everything. The story that I’ve been so enthralled with for months suddenly feels terribly flat. I know I just need to get this first rough draft done. I forced myself to put words on the page and managed to get the word count up to 13,757 this week.

Receiving another rejection for my children’s book was no surprise. The timing hurt, but it is still out for consideration with a few more publishers. There is hope, yet.

Feeling short on time for the rejected essay's topic, I decided to just self-publish the piece on Medium. It was quickly picked-up by Medium's curators to be a featured story in their Family section and has done well there. So, yesterday, I also submitted it to be considered for syndication on a couple sites – and one editor has already shown interest.

Then, Scary Mommy decided to run my first piece again, a wonderfully unexpected surprise. It still does really well on their page, gaining 1.9K reactions on their post alone and prompting over 350 more shares. Between the original on Scary Mommy and the syndication on That’s Inappropriate, this piece now has over 103.8K social media reactions in total!

And, the best part of the week was the couple of messages I got from friends – friends who had no idea that I was feeling discouraged – whose kind words of support and encouragement were a warm, gentle breeze in my sails, urging me to keep moving forward.

Here’s hoping this momentum carries me through the next week to some less choppy waters.

07 November 2018

#WIPWednesday

I broke the 10,000 words milestone on the novel this week!

The current word count sits at 11,423. Not counted in that were over 1,000 more words added to my notes in an effort to better organize my thoughts.

The essay I submitted last week is still out for concideration. As is my children's book manuscript.

I also made a couple of new images (memes, I guess) to share on social media. I find those posts get the most interaction and sometimes it is nice to sum up a piece I have written (or even an idea I have on my list but don't yet want to devote time to writing) into one visual quote that easily gains visability.